I've found no better mirror of the state of your walk with the Lord than the words of your youngest children, and your own words to them when correcting them. "Son, you know you're not supposed to do that. That was a foolish decision, you know it's wrong, and you're being disobedient to continue with this behaviour." All the while saying this I can feel the tug of the spirit telling me - "Listen closely to what you're saying. Why do you continue to disobey with things you know are wrong?" It's not a comfortable feeling, but at least it reminds me of God's mercy and encourages me to reaffirm my love for my son, a love that isn't dependent on his actions.
His words recently were especially painful as a mirror, after he overheard some arguing. I come downstairs to hear this question from my six-year old son, "When I grow up and become a Dad, will I get to yell at Mommy?" Yikes! Only the lamest of excuses come to mind: "But I was right!" or "Well no, actually I was yelling back, not yelling." Time to get out the fork for another piece of humble pie. "No, son. Dad was wrong to do that, and I'm sorry - to Mom for being disrespectful, and to you, for showing you a bad example. We all get angry from time to time, but that's no excuse for that type of behavior. Why don't we pray together, for me to be the best Dad and the best husband I can be, and for you to grow up to be the type of man that God wants you to be."
His little head nods in understanding, a sense of relief and a small smile comes to his face, and he bows his head with me to pray...
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